Completely real, unphotoshopped picture of hunters with cat, really |
Salt Lake City, UT—In a move sure to spark renewed outrage, Walter
Palmer, the same Minnesota dentist who recently killed the famous lion Cecil
has, over the weekend, hunted and killed President Monson’s cat.
The prophet’s cat, whose full name is Mahonri-Moriancum-Puurrrrr,
but who is also called the Cousin of Cecil or just Whiskers, was apparently
lured away from its Salt Lake home to City Creek Mall, where it was dazzled by
high end shopping and fabulous dining options, only to be shot first by a
crossbow and then by a high-powered shotgun, assault rifle, and two fully
automatic pistols.
Investigators, in piecing together the cat’s death, noted
that the perpetrator “took the tour of Temple Square” and then went with “hired
guides” in search of his latest highly-prized feline trophy. Investigators
noted the dark twist in the fact that all three hunters initially met at the
Lion House.
While he has not yet met with reporters to talk about the
loss, President Monson posted this on his Twitter account: “Feline Friends R
Lost; Hearts R Gritty Clumps of Sorrow in What Sometimes Feels like the Litter
Box of Life.”
Who wouldn't meet at the Lion House? They have THE best rolls and honey butter!
ReplyDeleteWe love you, Shawn! 😘 mom & dad
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