Monday, September 1, 2014


PROVO, UT—Scholars from BYU’s Department of Archeology have confirmed that ancient covenant people performed vicarious circumcisions as part of their temple worship. Dr. Albert Fenn recently provided compelling evidence that “images and fragments of text reveal that ancient peoples in the Americas and Middle East circumcised adolescent priesthood holders on behalf of dead ancestors who had not had that essential ritual performed themselves.” Though Fenn spoke at length about the ancient Abrahamic foundation for such a practice, a undergraduate assistant who asked to not be named commented that “where today doing baptism for the dead can be sort of ‘mixer’ for young women and men, let’s just say that none of the ancient young men were swinging by Wendy’s or Café Rio for some socializing after getting whatever foreskin they had left snipped off for their ancestors!” The same unnamed student concluded, “you think betting baptized 15 times is a pain…”

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